Lemonade Stands, Breakouts, and Caillou in Crisis =/

Today is June 19th.

It is ONLY June 19th.

. . .and I have already reached that point in our summer where I am pretty much ready to put the two younger boys out in the backyard, leave out a bowl of water for them, and lock the back door.

Don't get me wrong.  I LOVE these children.  They are FANTASTIC!!!

. . .EXCEPT for those brief, several hours-long period during every day when they have to actually INTERACT with each other.  Then everything just goes straight to hell in about 8 seconds.

. . . Padawan antagonizes Took (which he heartily denies. . . too bad I've seen it with my own eyes), plays games of keep-away with Took's prized possessions (Sheepie, Sheep-Turtle, Baby-Dog, and his Spiderman sunglasses), and Took has gotten into the habit of taking out his frustrations on his older brother in a physical manner.

. . .Mama won't let me paint right now?

Smack the crap out of Padawan.

. . .Mama says we can't go to the pool because it is lightning?

Kick a cat.

. . .Mama says you can't HAVE any more gummies right now?


Time to pick up the battle axe and prowl around for victims.

Seriously.

In addition to this, my youngest child seems to believe that I am not just here to "mommy" him and tend to his needs, but also to fill the role of maid, servant, juice-fetcher, and beck-and-call girl.

This makes me sad, because I can blame no one for it but myself.  
=(

And soon, Took is going to be pretty sad, too, because THAT shit ended YESTERDAY.

. . . It has taken me a while to get my head around it, but I finally have:   I'm not doing my child any favors by waiting on him hand and foot.  (This was NOT my intention, we SWEARS.  He was just my only baby.  And he was so LITTLE!  And so CUTE!!!  And so I helped him.  TOO much.  And that's over now.)

It started innocently enough:  "Mama?  Help me find my blue car?"

And so I did.

"Mama?  Help me find my juice-y?"

And so I did.

. . . and NOW it has gotten to the point where, yesterday, Took was sitting on the couch and watching Bears.  His juice cup was sitting on the coffee table, roughly 1 1/2 feet away.

"MAMAAAAAA!!!!  I NEED MY JUICE-Y!!!!"

0.0

It was right in front of him, but sweet-precious-little-baby didn't want to have to get down and get it himself.
=(

. . .

(This must be NIPPED, and with a quickness, before I end up raising a bright-purple ass-hat.)

So now, whenever my youngling comes to me and says:  "Mama find my blue car."

The answer he gets is:  "Find it yourself, baby.  I didn't play with your car, YOU did.  YOU find it."

(This is usually met with tears and complaints, immediately followed by a Time-Out, which is met with MORE tears and complaints.)

But this is just Phase One.

We are just about ready to enter Phase Two, which will entail the removal of gummy treats before nap time, a complete loss of night-night juice, and will be immediately followed by the brutal beheading of Caillou.

. . .even as I WRITE THIS, I am listening to the boys in the tub, taking swipes at each other, constantly complaining, and whining incessantly.

I hear:  "STOP, Nolan!  Don't DO that!!!  STOP!!!  DON'T DRINK THE BATH WATER!!!"

. . .

And I actually went in there and JUST SAID to my children:

"Hush.  Both of you.  You stop being bad, and YOU stop complaining and tattling.  I do NOT CARE if he drinks the bathwater.  It is gross, and we've told him that repeatedly.  But is is NOT poisonous, so if he WANTS to drink the bathwater, THEN JUST LET HIM DRINK THE BATHWATER!!  

UNLESS HE IS TRYING TO START A FIRE OR DRINK TOILET CLEANER, I DO NOT WANT TO HEAR ABOUT IT!!!"

. . .

So.  There's THAT.  =/

In my own defense. . .drinking bathwater will probably help him strengthen his immune system.

Yes.

I'm sure it will be fine.

======================================

In OTHER news, Spawn has been here this week, and it has been fantastic to see him.

=D

He was here for Father's Day, got to go with us to Pawpaw's house for a visit, got to work on some yards with his Dad (and earn some money), and we even fit in a pizza dinner at Mellow Mushroom with my mom last night, before he goes home today.

It has been GREAT having all three of them here!  =D

And today, before he leaves for home, we'll all go visit Daddy at work, and eat lunch in the cafeteria.  (Which, personally, I am RATHER excited about, as they have GREAT food, and a HUGE variety.  . . . Continuing evidence to support the notion that it doesn't take much to make me happy.  . . .basically, just the promise of a good lunch.)

And then he'll have to go home, and the next time we see him will be our beach trip next month. . . and then?  Probably not again until after he is officially a College Man.

. . .

That doesn't bear contemplation right now.

Moving on.

=================

In addition to working on yards with his dad, Spawn ALSO assisted dad yesterday in turning an old pallet and some spare pieces of wood into a LEMONADE STAND for the two younger boys!

We are participating in a neighborhood yard sale this weekend, and the boys have decided that they would like to man a lemonade stand (also for sale:  MINI MUFFINS!!!) at the side of our driveway, in an effort to have fun and make monies.

They are PRETTY excited (as seen below).

The stand is basically finished, we now just need to add a sign saying "Lemonade!!".  

And. . . "USED CARS!!".

(That last bit was Padawan's idea.)

So. . . what else?

uuuummmmmm. . .

Oh.  

I mentioned that we went and ate with The Fam last night, and it was great.  Good pizza.  =)

So we got home from dinner, and it was getting late, so we started getting the two youngest boys ready for bed:  teeth-brushing, night-night juice preparing, jammy-dressing.  

And, as it is summer in Alabama, and just BROILING hot, as SOON as we got home I walked into our bathroom so I could wash off my makeup.

(Just as a sidenote:  I am a firm believer in makeup.  I'm not saying I care if anyone else wears it, not at all.  I'm just saying that I am vain, and getting older every day.  And when my husband comes home from a day of work, and the house is a wreck, and the children are fighting, and the cats are hacking up hairballs, and I'm in a paint-stained old t-shirt. . . at LEAST I am (usually) wearing at least a little lip gloss or blush.  Not JUST for him, but also because it makes me feel better about MYSELF.

Like my Granny used to say:  

"Every old barn looks better painted."

Too true, Gran.  Too true.)

But I digress.  It was HOT, dinner was OVER, and we were HOME.  

I was washing that crap OFF.

So I did. . . and looked up at the mirror, face still dripping wet, and find that my face has exploded with blemishes.

WTF????

I AM ALMOST 40.  I HAVE LAUGH LINES, AND CELLULITE, AND I'M MAKING STRIDES WHERE I CAN, BUT I AM NO LONGER A SPRING CHICKEN!!  SO WHY THE HELL AM I STILL HAVING TO DEAL WITH THINGS LIKE BREAKOUTS??????!!!??

STRAIGHT.

SHENANIGANS.

So I'm standing there, thinking basically ALL of this, and saying to myself:  WHY is my face so broken out??  WHY is this happening??!  THIS MAKES NO SENSE!  I HAVEN'T DONE ANYTHING DIFFERENTLY---

Oh.

. . .

My traditional evening Butterfinger.

=/

(I have only JUST discovered that this is my favorite candy bar, and have been enjoying one every evening for the last several days.  It has been delightful.)

BUTTERFINGERRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!

CURSE YOUR SUDDEN BUT INEVITABLE BETRAYAL!!!!!

. . .

Speaking of betrayal, that brings me to my final thought for this post:

A few days ago, Took and I were watching Caillou while we laid down for his nap.  And I noticed something. . . AMISS.

The dad's voice was different.  

And the Granddad's.

They had. . . switched voice actors.

I HATE IT when shows do this!!!

I just HATE IT.

. . . It would be like if a main character was a blond, 8 year-old fairy princess, and then one day, BOOM.  She was replaced with a drooling green space mutant, without ANY explanation at ALL.

DID YOU THINK WE WOULD NOT NOTICE???!!??

DID YOU THINK WE WOULD NOT CARE???!!??

YOU SIMPLY COULD NOT BE MORE WRONG.

. . .honestly, I have not felt this betrayed since they replaced Aunt Viv's on the Fresh Prince of Bel Air, with no explanation at all.

I CARE VERY MUCH ABOUT THE PLIGHT OF AUNT VIV.

. . . wherever she may be, I just hope she is safe.  And happy.

=/

That's all for today.

#CHAOS

Thrift Stores, Reading Lists, and Basically Killing It.

The children are in bed.

. . . . . . 

Allow me to repeat:  

THE CHILDREN.  ARE.  IN BED.

=D

Now I'm gonna have some ME TIME!!!!  

. . . which, sadly, translates to "time for me to write something while I swig cherry coke and look at cat pictures and think about possible snack options in the pantry."

=)

So I just sent a long-winded message to my mom (as I often DO), and was just thinking about how it would be REALLY SUPER GREAT if I could just write a blog post as easily as I write a message to her.

So that's what I'm gonna do here, as an exercise.

We'll see how it turns out.  =)

OH MY GOD I LOVE THESE CHILDREN BUT SWEET LORD WE'RE ONLY A WEEK INTO SUMMER AND I THINK THEY MIGHT KILL EACH OTHER AND THEY ARE DRIVING ME CRAZY AND DO WE HAVE TO TAKE THEM WITH US ON VACATION???

And okay-- to veer off topic for a moment?  I just had to turn off the safe-search on my computer, JUST TO LOOK UP the phrase 'mama cat is having none of your shit.'

And so I thought:  Sure!  I'll turn off safe-search!  How bad could that possibly be??  . . .

Perhaps I am naive, but I was a smidge disappointed.  =(

Anyway.

The children.

It has rained for most of the last week here, so the boys have been largely confined to the indoors.  This has not been an ideal situation.

No it has NOT.

We've played with cardboard boxes, we've played with play-doh.  We've painted with several different mediums, we've gone to Target.  We've gotten milkshakes, we've played card games, and we've read lots and lots of books.  And we even got to the pool, once, before the dark clouds chased us in.

. . . the boys drove their Power Wheels truck to the pool.

And I really cannot stress ENOUGH how very much they thought that they were awesomeness personified that day.  =)

But aside from these fleeting interludes of sibling bliss, these two little turd-squirrels have positively been at each other's throats.  It was after only about 4 1/2 days together that Took began to walk around the house, declaring to anyone that would listen:  "Desi need to go home to his mama!  He need to go to HIS mama's house!  His mama miss him!!"

And then on Sunday, he actually did go see his mom for a while, and pretty much before their car had left the driveway, Took was already saying:  *sigh* "I miss him."

. . . granted, this was still only roughly 45 minutes after he had smacked the crap out of the back of his brother's head with a plastic hammer. . . but perhaps he was experiencing remorse for that.  One can hope.  =)

What else?

Oh!  The kids are getting an allowance for the summer, and they're doing really well with it.  We had a discussion about how they were each going to be given chores to do each day, with the chores fitting their respective ages.  At the end of the week, I would decide how competently, and without argument or whining, they had completed their chores.  And this would result in an allowance. 

Once Padawan got his head around the money aspect of it, he was 100% on board.  Whenever I asked him to do something, all I had to say was that it was a "chore", and he would stop what he was doing and jump right up and do it.  Took was. . . more reluctant.  Until I discovered that I could give him his money in coins, and let him carry some in his pocket, and take them out and look at them from time to time.  (Don't worry mom -- I washed them first.)  =)

So they each got their first payday today.

We were out bargain-hunting for some summer clothes for both of them, and the whole time I was driving I was explaining how money worked, and how they could save it and plan for bigger items they'd like to buy, etc., etc.  

Then we went to 2nd & Charles, to let them spend it.  Before we got out, I asked them what they were looking to spend their money on.

Padawan:  "A video game.  Baseball or football."

Took:  "New baby!!!"

=)

So we browsed.  We compared prices.  We circled the whole store.  Twice.  We made some difficult decisions.

Pad had $5.00 to spend, and Took had $3.00.  And when we left a bit later, Pad was proudly waving the baseball game he'd found for $4.50, and Took was clutching a fluffy white stuffed dog that he'd found for $3.00.

They were just happy as cats.  =D

-------------------------------------

While we were walking around the thrift shop today, Took sprawled in the back of the cart, Padawan lagging behind, I turned to Pad and said:  "Hey.  . . . do you know where we are?"

He looked at me.

Pad:  "No.  . . . where are we?"

Me:  "We're in the THRIFT SHOP."

Pad:  "REALLY?!?"

Me:  "Yep."

Pad:  "COOL!"

Me:  "Hey.  . . . you know why I got that shirt?"

Pad:  ". . . why?"

Me:  "CAUSE IT WAS ONLY 99 CENTS!!!!"

. . . which, aside from being a lame joke, was also a huge mistake because we were both humming that damn song for the rest of the day.   =/

Hmmm. . .

So. . . I guess the only other thing I have that's on my mind is just that I am basically killing it at life lately.

SRSLY.

My husband has been doing what he does in the summer, and that is keep busy.  Last year, he started doing yards in our neighborhood on his off days.  Because he said he liked it.  What can I say about my boy? 

He's a good earner.

But this was about ME.

=D

So usually the set-up in our house is that I take care of the boys' breakfast and lunch, and my husband makes dinner.

But he's been working.  Even on his off-days.  Hell, ESPECIALLY on his off-days.

So I figured I could step up and do a little more, and I decided to start making dinner for him.  Not just every once in a while, but pretty much all the time.  (The only reason for not ALL the time is that it is something he really enjoys doing, and is very good at.)  

So we've had taco night, some amazing BLT wraps, some roast beef wraps, some shrimp po-boys, some chicken fried rice. . . and I forget what else.  As you can see, nothing fancy.  But we have eaten WELL this week.  =D

And it made me feel really good!

And sometimes I'd find myself looking around the house, thinking:

"It is almost 5 p.m.  The children are still alive, and neither is currently concussed.  The pets are alive and holding up nicely, considering.  We are all clean, and well-fed, and the house is picked up, and the clothes are clean and put away.  And I am wearing real clothes, and not just repurposed pajamas.   . . .I have literally not stopped moving all day, and I really feel that it's pretty obvious that I am completely kicking ASS at this stay-at-home mom routine.  Oh, what?  The kids need new clothes?  How about consignment shop?!!
BOOM!!!  You're clothed for summer!

Oh, two kids in the house, ALL THE TIME, instead of just one?  When I am completely not used to that, and the baby isn't either and is fairly vocal about it and it has rained for 5 days straight?!??

How about art instruction and play-doh time??  

BAM!!!

Kids getting bored and climbing the walls and really making me start to question my own sanity?

How about let's do some CHORES and make some MONEY and learn some RESPONSIBILITY??!!??  The cats don't need clean water EVERY day, right??!!?

EAT MY BLUEBERRY MUFFIN-FLAVORED DUST, CAROL BRADY!!!

What's that you say?  Padawan needs to strengthen his reading skills this summer?

How about a WHOLE STACK of chapter books??  How about a Ninja Frog that solves crimes??

HOW ABOUT FROG AND FREAKING TOAD, WHICH WAS SUGGESTED BY HIS TEACHER AS A GREAT FIT FOR HIS READING LEVEL??!!!??

And wait.  We found it at the thrift shop??  So we were able to get it for NEXT TO NOTHING???!!!??"

FWOOOOOOOOOOOOSH

Quadruple points.

I win.

I win at life.

=D

So that's all for now.

. . . I know what you're thinking. . .

And the answer is no.

It doesn't take much to make me happy.  

Not much at all.

=D

=D

Also, we have these things in our shower.

One is a gator, and one is an octopus.  They've been in there for two days.  After the third day, they are supposed to be quite a bit larger than they were to begin with.  (I do not have the exact figures here in front of me.  My apologies.)

So as of tomorrow, the waiting is over.

. . . I'm thinking the boys are thinking they're going to be, like, 8 feet tall or something, sentient, and possibly friendly. 

It is the only way I can rationalize their excitement levels being this high.

=D